Deep breath in. Deep breath out. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. I am trying to calm myself. My throat tightens up. It isn’t working. My annual performance review is nearing. In seven years I have never felt this way about my performance. The numbers don’t lie and I know what they are saying. I tell myself I’m failing and I am expecting to hear the same from management.
That is not what happens.
We discuss business metrics acknowledging that it has been a tough year. The rest of the conversation is a bit blurry. We talk through the items on the checklist with care and diplomacy. In reference to one performance measure my manager says, “I think it’s because you don’t think that you can.”
She is right.
I am not sure when I began to tell myself that I was anything less than capable, but at some point that lie crept in. I developed a fear of inadequacy. It is one of the reasons why I put off certain goals, dreams, and, dare I say it, relationships. EEK!
Earlier this year I read this book by Lisa Nichols called Abundance Now. It is all about changing your mindset from that of lack & depravity to one of abundance and prosperity. One strategy that Lisa employs to help with this mental shift is particularly effective. I believe she calls it Exposing the Lies. On a sheet of paper you write down the lies you tell yourself, no matter how trivial, leaving four spaces under each one. Once you finish your list of lies you go back to each one and write down the facts, the truth with a positive spin on it.
Now I’m not going to just air out all my lil’ business, but I did include a few of my lies below to serve as an example.
Lie: I am doing a terrible job.
Truth: I am learning and developing new skills every day. God blessed me with this opportunity. I know that because I distinctly prayed for this one, challenges included. I am grateful for this experience and it is preparing me for whatever lies ahead.
Lie: I’m bad at dating.
Truth: I was in a romantic situation as a young adult when I wasn’t 100% clear on my identity. It didn’t go as I planned and I thank God for that. Through different dating experiences I have learned more about myself and developed standards. I know who I am. I am complete without a partner. I have learned better how to show care and compassion to others. I’ve learned better how to love myself and I’m still learning. I am being prepared for the mate that God has for me.
Lie: I have bad knees.
Truth: I suffered a knee injury as a child. In spite of that my knees are strong. I have been knee injury free since 2004. Since then my knees have carried me through a half marathon, countless 5k runs, squats, stairs, walking 20,000 steps a day on the streets of Italy and even down a runway or two. They work just fine. They will continue to carry me as long as I continue to take care of them. I am active when I can be and I rest when I need it.
Reframing the way I think about myself is the most critical piece to this whole REMIX puzzle. Exposing the lie and replacing it with the positive truth is a way for me to rewrite my story and take the necessary steps towards living an abundant life. The truth is I am more than capable of achieving anything I set my mind to, especially with God’s help. I may be weak in some areas, but He will definitely supply the increase.
What lies do you need to expose and cast down in order to live your best, abundant life?